Can't say goodbye
by xCho Chang
Summary: Cho can't deal with Cedric's death. There seems only one way left to see him again.  One-shot story.


Cho Chang strolled to Hogwarts like a ghost. Each time she saw something that reminded her of him it was like a thousand knifes stabbed into her stomach. And especially now she was back at Hogwarts, she got reminded at him a lot. During the holiday it had been bearable. Despite from the nightmares she had. She didn't know what had happened on that graveyard, Harry Potter claimed he was killed by Lord Voldemort and Cho couldn't stop picturing it. How her beautiful Cedric, probably in an attempt to protect the boy who lived, would get hit by a green flash and how his useless body would hit the ground the next second. Had he been afraid? Had he thought of her afterwards? Had he said something to Harry about her or for her? Or had there been no time? She needed to ask Harry. She needed closure. She needed these tears to stop, these tears that just would keep flowing. Again, now she passed the little bench where they once had been kissing. Cho almost screamed and dropped herself on her knees, hiding her face into her arms that leaned on the bench. Sobbing, grieving over his death. Cedric Diggory, the boy who should have lived.

It was horrible how everyone seemed to think she should've got over it by now. They didn't understand. They didn't understand what she and Cedric had. What they shared.

'My beautiful Cho,' he would say every time he saw her. Then he would kiss her lips and she would smile. Then he would take her arm and guide her to her next lesson, or walk with her through the yard when they both had an hour off.

'When I'm done with school, I will ask you to marry me,' he would whisper in her ear then. 'And from the money I will win with the tournament I will buy us a house,' he had been so sure he was going to win. She had pictured it. Their wedding, their house their…children. She always pictured them like him. Just as handsome as him. But now he was dead. And she would never get a pair of redheaded children who would run around her or have a Cedric who would grow old with her. She had been so happy. They had been so happy, why did it have to be taken away?

…_Don't let me be seeing you taking part in any activities who will go against the ministry Or against Professor Umbridge. _

That is how the letter of her mom ended. Of course she didn't want that, according she could lose her job in that case. If she only knew what she was doing during the DA. On those moments she had some peace at her mind. She had the feeling she was revenging Cedric by practicing it. Everytime she looked towards the mirror where his picture was and then he would smile and nod and she pretended he was standing at the sideline, encouraging her. Sometimes when she tried really hard she could imagine him standing there and then she had to hold herself to not run to him to see if he was real or not. But he wasn't real. He wouldn't come back. He would never come back again.

That night she was once again in a restless sleep.' _Cho'. _His voice, her name. ' _My beautiful Cho'. _She looked at him in her dreams.

'Cedric!' she yelled out. She wanted to go towards him, touch him but she couldn't. Something was between them. It was like glass and she could only see his gorgeous smile but she couldn't kiss his lips.

'Be happy Cho,' he said. 'Be happy for me,'

'Come back to me,' She pleaded, pressing her hand against the glass between them. He would put his hand against the same spot where she held hers.

'If I only could,' he said, his smile sad now.

'I need you!' he started to fade. The dream started to fade and he slipped away from her.

'I want to see you happy Cho, remember that,' he said.

'Cedric, stay! Please!' But he would keep fading.

'_Remember that…'_

Cho shot up in her bed. She rubbed her eyes and started crying again. She tried to keep it down to not wake the other girls, who were already so annoyed by her constant sobbing in her sleep or her screaming. She knew what was between him and her. Death.

She tried to give Cedric his wish, to be happy, to move on. But it was exhausted to pretend. That day during the DA meeting they would practice the patronus charm. Hers was a swan, she had never known and she smiled while she saw the animal moving so gracious and free through the room. It didn't have burdens, it didn't feel sadness. Just peace and freedom. Cho wished to be that swan.

Everything crashed down. Marietta had betrayed the DA. Harry blamed her for sticking with her friend. But what else should she have done? Marietta was the only one who stayed her friend, now she wasn't her cheery popular self anymore. She had proven to be a true friend when Cho needed her, wasn't this the least she could do for her? Cho sobbed. Cedric, she needed him so. He would wrap his arms around her. He would have joined the DA too. He would have been just as good of a teacher as Harry. He wouldn't blame her for sticking with her friend. He would understand. He would kiss her sorrows away. He would remind her at their future. Cho stood up. She had made a choice. She would break that glass wall between them.

She was standing on the astronomy tower. A breeze played with her hair and made it flutter against her face. She looked the long way down. Tears dripped over her cheeks. Then she climbed on the edge of the tower. Some students who walked past the tower notice and would stand still and look up and point. There would be nothing they could do. It would be too fast for them to get a teacher, too fast for them to interfere themselves. Cho closed her eyes.

'_Cedric I love you,' _ She spread her arms and jumped and for a moment she was the sawn.

She opened her eyes. She was comfortable, she was warm. She didn't expect dying would be so easy. She looked around. It was foggy and she didn't wear any clothes but she didn't mind. She stood up slowly and looked at her hands.

'I have been waiting for you,'

Cho's head shot up.

'Cedric!' she yelled out and threw herself in his arms as he stood there in all his glory, more beautiful than he ever had been down earth.

'Oh my beautiful Cho,' he said. 'What have you done,'

' I can't live without you,' Cho said as she held him, finally again. She smelt his scent, she touched his lips, she felt his warm body.

His hands would touch her hair and then he would press his lips upon hers.

'Where are we?' Cho asked.

'You tell me,' Cedric said smiling loving.

'I think we are in the Hogwarts garden, where we first kissed,'

'A good place to start our journey,' Cedric smiled brushing his lips over her hair.

'Journey?' Cho asked.

'Yes,' Cedric took her hand. 'We will travel further, down the road,'

'Do you know the way?' Cho asked.

'The way will show itself,' Cedric said.

'Where will it lead to?' Cho asked again.

'To our final destination.' Cedric answered.

'What will that be?'

'I don't know, but it doesn't matter as long we are together,'

'As long we are together,' Cho said and squeezed his hand softly.

THE END


End file.
